Nothing surprising about this:  SNOOKI wants to give birth in heels.  She says, quote, "I'm packing heels, my leopard-print gown, eyelashes and makeup! "I wanna look good when [my baby] first sees me."

We finally know where ROBERT PATTINSON is hiding out:  At REESE WITHERSPOON'S ranch in Ojai, California. Robert and Reese co-starred in "Water for Elephants", and when those KRISTEN STEWART cheating photos surfaced, Reese offered him the place so he could get away from it all.

 Reese and her husband, who are expecting a baby, use the ranch as a vacation home.  Sources say Robert is, quote, "a total mess . . . He's questioning everything."

RadarOnline.com says Rob and Kristen ARE speaking again . . . but that Rob is nowhere near a place where he can forgive her.  A source says, quote, "Rob just isn't going to be able to get beyond the cheating, one time or not."

 That hasn't stopped Kristen from trying.  She's been calling and texting him constantly.  A source says, quote, "She's dying to save the relationship.  It's the only thing she cares about."

Lately, we've been seeing pictures of MACAULAY CULKIN looking like he's wasting away to nothing.  Which means it's time for the obligatory "Macaulay is hooked on heroin" tabloid stories.

First out of the gate is the "National Enquirer" . . . which claims Macaulay is messing with heroin AND various painkillers.

He reportedly spends $6,000 a month on drugs . . . and a source says, quote, "He's been hooked for a year and a half, and his drug of choice is either heroin or oxycodone. 

"Mac is surrounding himself with junkies and lowlifes.  It's a real tragedy."

CUBA GOODING JR. isn't a wanted man in New Orleans anymore.  His arrest warrant was canceled yesterday after he met with police to discuss the incident in which he allegedly shoved a female bartender. He was scheduled to appear in court tomorrow, but that probably won't happen now, because the bartender has reportedly decided not to press charges.